As a kid, I was always told that when bad things happened to me it was because GOD was punishing me. It took me a really long time to become aware of that deep-rooted belief, distill it and decide that it was simply not true.

Prior to shifting that long standing belief, I unconsciously created self punishing experiences. Like marrying a man who beat me frequently and verbally abused me, sabotaging my health and denying my life’s work. These experiences reflected the belief that I was not a good person and I deserved to be punished.

Even worse, I believed that I would never really be happy because I had made many poor choices.  The small voice in my head reminded me that people who don’t show up in life as perfect, don’t receive good life experiences.  Deep, right?

The truth is that GOD does not punish us.  The Universe does not punish us.  Life does not punish us.

When difficult circumstances show up it’s almost always in the name of self growth.

Many times we don’t hear the subtle voice of change and expansion and it takes a bigger experience to get our attention.

When those experiences show up, we can look at them through the lens of fear, punishment, victimhood, and blame or, we can ask the challenge, “What do you desire to teach me”?

This question is powerful.  It instantly disarms the idea that we have bad luck, are not a good person, or as in my case, deserve to be punished.

Challenging experiences are not meant to be embodied.  They are meant to assist us with growing into the next version of ourselves.  We are to hear its voice, receive the wisdom and lesson, express gratitude, AND let it go. Yes, release it into the ethos of nothingness.



Grab your journal, light a candle and have a heart to heart conversation with the challenge.  Allow the spirit of curiosity to lead the way.  Be in blissful expectation and allow the adversity to speak to you and direct your next steps. Consider reflecting on these questions….

+How can I grow from this experience?

+What’s the blessing in this situation?

+What do I need to do in order to move past this?

+What in my thinking and being is desiring to expand?

+What am I to let go of?

+How can I help myself?

+What new way of being is desiring to be expressed?

+What am I meant to learn from all of this?

+How can I be more comfortable with the discomfort that I’m experiencing in this moment? 

Stay away from asking why questions. For the most part, why questions keep us in the midst of the old story.  Keep from embodying the challenge and instead put all of your focus on the wisdom and the lesson within the challenge.

The way that you overcome challenges and setbacks without becoming stuck in them, is to uncover the new story that desires to emerge.  The challenge is not the point of focus, the purpose of it is.  Think of it as a test that you are meant to ace.

Will you let life’s challenges take you out?  Or will these experiences be used as opportunities for growth and alignment with your truest self?

Do you see that what appears to be punishment is actually life, clamoring expansion and alignment?

As Eckhart Tolle says, “Nothing you ever did or that was done to you could ever touch even in the slightest the radiant essence of who you are”.